ON THE VANGUARD

STEP UP
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
Ephesians 5:25

Today’s thought is aimed mostly towards the men, but in the end I think you will see there is a point made for all. In a past writing I found of mine, I had made the following comment concerning pride. “It was the deception of pride that tricked Eve to bite. The serpent taunted, ‘Why should you not be as wise as God?’” This thought has been playing in mind repeatedly since reading it last night. As such, this story in Genesis 3 is where I opened my Bible to start reading this morning.
We read in Genesis 3:1 that the serpent asks the woman, “Did God really say you cannot eat from any tree?” Eve’s reply was that God allowed them to eat from any tree except the one in the middle, for it would bring death. Being the crafty snake that he was, the serpent worked to manipulate the conversation his way. He spoke to Eve again and said that death was not the final result, rather that God was fearful that they would be as smart as God Himself, and God didn’t want competition. So Eve took the fruit and ate it.
I think we read this story and place blame on the wrong person. Yes it is true that Eve ate first, but within this verse is a point we need to consider. “When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it” (Gen 3:6). Did you catch it? Adam was right there with her. He was probably close enough to hear the serpent talk, close enough to hear Eve’s reply, and obviously close enough for her to reach out and give some fruit to him. But where in this verse does it say that he resisted? Where does it say that he stepped up as a man to protect his wife from the serpent and prevent her from acting against God’s will? It doesn’t. I cannot help but wonder if he was waiting purposefully to see what would happen to her before trying himself, like how scientists test on animals before testing on humans.
But as the story goes on, Adam’s attitude does not change. A few verses later, God returns to the Garden of Eden. Now God, all knowing, is already aware of what has happened, but He asks anyway. As a parent, I can understand this. There are times when I see my kids do something wrong yet they are unaware I am watching. I question them about what just happened and hope to hear the truth. Sadly enough, I hear a fib or excuse that I know is not true. But I want to give them that chance to be honest. Perhaps that was God’s method when He asked, “Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” (Gen 3:11).
It is here again we see Adam dodging. Adam replies to God, “The woman you put here with me – she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate” (Gen 3:12). In essence, Adam was blame-shifting. He knew that he had violated God’s command just as well as she did, but he did not want to take the blame for his own action. I have been there. When my wife at the time caught me looking at porn, my excuses came flowing. We’re never intimate because we’re never together. The baby takes all your time. You do not love me, you tolerate me. On and on I could go. But when all the excuses were exhausted, the truth came down to the fact that I was unwilling to take the responsibility of my actions. I, like Adam, found it easier to shift the blame onto my wife and circumstances.
Closing today, I want to look at Ephesians 5:25. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This is not always easy. This is where our pride gets in the way. We want the wife to submit to us, but we do not always want to love our wife the way we should. And this is where Adam needed to step up. Seeing the serpent luring his wife to eat, Adam should have stepped up and demand he be gone. Why not, he had authority over every animal (Gen 1:28). But he stood by and did nothing, nothing except extend his arm out to grab the fruit she offered.
Men, let us step up and take the place of honor that God has given to us. Our duty now is to love our wives as Christ loved the church. Jesus gave of Himself, and gave Himself, as an act of love. I speak as one who has learned the hard way in hopes that my past may in some way may prevent this same mistake in others. Let us take our place as men, fathers, and husbands, and love like Christ. No more blame-shifting, no more dodging the bullet, no more pointing fingers. It is time to step up.