ON THE VANGUARD

JESUS, LOVER OF MY SOUL
“You have filled my heart with greater joy than when their grain and new wine abound.”
Psalm 4:7

At the age of thirty-five, John Wesley was converted to Christianity. He would later explain it as a warming of his heart, not his mind, toward Christ, and in that warming he found himself becoming a lover of God. It was shortly after his conversion that he wrote the hymn “Jesus, Lover of My Soul.” The first verse of this hymn reads: “Jesus, Lover of my soul/Let me to thy bosom fly.” Sadly, a more acceptable translation of the song is known today, replacing ‘Lover’ with ‘Savior,’ or ‘Refuge.’ But why? According to John Julian, a Methodist pastor and hymnologist, “The difficulty is the term Lover as applied to our Lord.” Yet while the words Savior and refuge rightly explain Him, they do not carry the same meaning that Wesley originally penned. So then the question becomes a personal one. How comfortable are you with referring to the Lord as your Lover?
David had no problem expressing his passion for the LORD. In fact, as the ark was brought into Jerusalem, David danced with all his might before his Lover. His display of affection was so filled with emotion that his wife was embarrassed and stated, “How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, disrobing in the sight of the slave girls of his servants as any vulgar fellow would! (II Sam 6:20)” If that was embarrassing, David advised her it was nothing compared to the undignified response he could continue to give the LORD. His dance had nothing to do with drawing attention to himself but rather it was his expression of zeal for his Lover.
And this was just one example. A quick glance through the Psalms also shows David had no issues with knowing the LORD as his Lover. Psalm 4:7 shows David filled with a great joy from his Lover. The LORD gives forth a river of delight to David in Psalm 36:8. And in Psalm 42:1, David so craves for his Lover that as the deer pants for water so he pants for God. He is smitten by God and finds the love of his Lover better than life itself in Psalm 63:3. Shall we go on and look through the Psalms? David, the man after God’s own heart, wrote these Psalms as a full grown man, not as a teenager caught in infatuation, or as one consumed with lust. He had fought against Goliath and become the warrior that was chanted about, killing his tens-of-thousands. And yet, no record of his love towards his wives matches the detail of the passion he had for his Lover.
Oh Jesus, I want you to be the Lover of my soul. I have been married and divorced, and have found myself desiring marriage again. But now I find myself even more so desiring You as my Lover. I want to forsake the infatuation and lust and find true Love. Let the expressions of David, and the words penned by John Wesley become more than words to me. Let them be the springboard from which I write to You, my Lover, my expression of affection.